Remotivating

When it takes a long time to do something, you go through ebbs and flows of enthusiasm. Coming back to derby a year ago, I was really determined to play this season. But there were complications. First of all, I'm not nearly as in shape as I was the first time I was in derby. I'm still not. The second complication was the illness I had, but hey, we're way past that now.

I missed both practices last week, and I'm going to be missing some more this month. That's frustrating. I find that missing practice really sets me back in a way I can't describe. After just one week it can feel like I'm starting back at zero. 

Today in preparation for practice tonight, I concentrate on hydrating, getting out for a walk and not eating too much. That's all well and good, but I still look at goals like getting to skate in October, and now it feels almost impossible, like I'll never get there. 

But this weekend I'm going to Ottawa with the team to witness our away game. And I remind myself that I get to hang out with these awesome ladies and be part of the development of this great sport. Who knows where derby will go? If it became mainstream it might lose some of its magic. But at the same time, it would be so cool to be involved at the beginning of something like basketball--which I'm sure seemed like a really weird sport during it's first decade too. 

It might take forever. I might never really succeed. But I love being a part of it. I'm addicted.